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Monday, January 29, 2007

Hype/Hate For January 29, 2007

What a Fucking Jerk
By H.P. McHatey

Welcome to Hype/Hate folks! The way the game is played is that I give you very short asinine comments about recent films I have seen. They are followed by the ULTIMATE rating system…….. THE HYPE/HATE Rating system!!!! If I like a movie it gets my HYPE, but if it sucks donkey balls, I send in the haters to call out “HATE, HATE, HATE!!!” on dat azz. Let me know what you think. I wont hate on anyone who thinks my opinions are really shitty, but I will love you if you love reading my shit. It’s all good MY NERDS!!!!!!! We’re all here to have fun, and maybe learn a little something. And now we begin with the wonderful world of Joss Whedon in………

Serenity- The way to watch this movie is in two separate parts. The first part of the film should be watched with apprehension thinking about whether this movie will be better than his writing on Astonishing X-Men. The second part should be watched thinking what a big fucking nerd you are for comparing these two things and realizing that maybe you should find something else to do besides thinking about what Joss Whedon needs to improve in this movie to make it more “Buffy-like”. –HYPE IT!!!

Miami Vice- I thought this movie was Fantastico!!! You get Michael Mann and Jamie Foxx together again to make another awesome film!! One of my few qualms about this movie is why Jamie Foxx couldn’t drive the awesome cars. Why does that JerkStore, Colin Ferrett have to drive. Racist producers! Foxx would’ve looked way cooler driving but whatevs. – HYPE THIS SHIT!!!

Little Miss Sunshine- Call me a douche, but this movie was too fhaaaaaaaacking cute!
That sweet girl made me giggle like a little bitch so many times. That Arkin dude was hilarious, and I never wanna see that guy from The Office look so sad ever AGAIN!!!

Hard Candy- I will have to apologize to any Indieseen writers who like this movie, cuz I think there’s pics of the DVD cover on the site, but this movie made me want to hang that little girl in the movie. What a creepy little bitch!! But not because I was scared of her but because of the way her DumbAss lips looked. They looked like she was eating lemons while she was taking a shit! Aside from the dumbass acting and that fucking girl annoying the hell out of me, this movie was fucking retarded. You would think the NutSACk cutting scene would make me cringe, but it just made me think about how much she needed to get her ass beat for having such a painfully hard face to watch. She was kinda cute though.

That’s all for this installment of HYPE/HATE!! I will periodically be HYPING or HATING on any films my lazy ass gets to watch. For now, peace out my nerds! And remember: Don’t HYPE/HATE it unless you really care about it.

1 comment:

Rage said...

dude that was fuking hilarious!,
hard candy did kinda suck